(week 15.75). why I’m an open book.

For a woman my size, some may find it bizarre that I’m as open as I am about my weight loss journey. So why am I doing it?

For one, I am the kind of person that needs to be held accountable—really accoutable—when it comes to things like this. I am a great self-starter and motivator when it comes to everything EXCEPT food.

When I started weight watchers, I told myself that I needed to be totally honest with myself about eating, portions, exercising... whatever. If I cheated, I was only cheating myself. But really, by getting my friends and family involved, they have served as fellow motivators, keeping me going when I didn’t want to.

Plus, people are naturally curious about life changes. You know it’s true. Look at shows like “Biggest Loser” or “I Used To Be Fat”. So, instead of occasionally posting pictures of a shrinking me, why not keep you all in the loop with WHAT I’m doing?! It’s not that I mind questions from y’all (I love them, and have gotten quite a few of you to commit to losing weight for yourself!), but why not keep it honest?

I think it would be interesting to look back on this experience, and see that it didn’t come easy. I can see my struggles, or my successes. I can see the changes in myself and know WHY I’m doing this. It’s a fascinating thing to have that kind of insight.

And at the end of the day, it’s just my personality to document, document, document. I love writing; it’s my release, my passion and (while not this topic) MY CAREER. I just can’t shut it off, so why fight it?!

(week 15.5). workin' (out) woman.

I took the next step! Instead of just talking about it, I joined the FMCAC (community center) and started working out today.

I was unsure about what types of exercises I'd be up to doing, though. It's been YEARS since I'd worked out last (not counting chasing the baby), and didn't want to get overwhelmed. I learned about a really cool app a month or so ago--Couch to 5K--and am trying that out.

What is Couch to 5K(C25K)? Essentially, it gets lazy bums like me conditioned to do a 5K, in 9 short weeks. It alternates between walking and running commands, and over time, challenges and pushes you to endure the long trek. Plus, you can listen to iPod music and post results to FB, so why WOULDN'T I do it?! LOL

Today was hard to get through, but at least I went, and more importantly, followed through.

I CAN DO THIS!

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(week 15). keepin’ it real... keepin’ it flat...

I weighed in today. Leading up to it, I was so nervous! With Noah’s birthday last weekend (happy birthday, baby boy!), I pigged OUT on cake. I mean, did I honestly expect my tiny 1-year-old to eat the massive cake by himself? The leftovers looked too good, and I couldn’t resist. So yes, I had (at least) one piece of cake every single day for the past WEEK! EEK!

I tried to watch portions otherwise, but I felt my plan slipping away. I stepped on the scale and *gasp * I hadn’t gained! ...I didn’t lose, either, but really, I did good to maintain!

I’m buckling down, though. With just three pounds from my next BIG goal, I need to step it up. And that is why I am taking some time tonight to go sign up for the gym. Nothing fancy, just the basics, but I need something to keep me moving toward my ultimate goal. I’d like to lose about 17 more pounds before the cruise, and that’s in just over two months. I can’t sit around just HOPING it will happen, right? So off my butt I go...

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(week 13). make progress or make excuses.

The title of my blog is a quote we were left with in today’s WW meeting. According to my leader, she heard it from a Real Estate guru (who’s name escaped her, sorry), but felt that it applies to weight loss. I absolutely agree. I find it encapsulates my journey. Basically, “put up or shut up”... “try or fail”. I’m in this to make progress, and I need to work on not making excuses about my faults. BUT, without an excuse or two, I wouldn’t have a blog, so…

After the past two weeks I’ve had, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was down another 2.6 pounds! (Please know, I did NOT weigh in last week)

After the last weigh-in, I was very focused on the plan. Then Noah got sick. It happened so fast, that it was hard to focus on anything else BUT him (as it should be). He was diagnosed with RSV and pneumonia, and we were admitted to the hospital for a few days (read about it here: http://mamabare.blogspot.com/2011/01/week-from-hell.html).

Now, kids, for what you SHOULDN’T DO on WW. NOTE: while I ultimately had a very successful weigh in, don’t follow this. Basically, “do what I say, not what I do”, got it?

I didn’t count at all. I tried to keep track of SOME things in my head, but for the most part, I said eff it. I managed my portions by sight, and I can tell you now that some were waaaaay off. There was a day or two where I just couldn’t eat, then I found myself wanting to snack on everything! Swedish Fish, Doritos, Crackers, Popcorn, Cookies… if it was in front of me, I wanted it in. my. belly.

I’m sure the stress of it all did a number on me, and I need to work harder on doing this the right way ALL THE TIME.

*end of the bad junk. time to tune back in*

Alex and I are talking about joining a gym, and have it narrowed down to two. We are looking for CHEAP, with child care and exercise equipment, of course… other than that, we don’t really care. Otherwise, I’ll step up my activity level with more walking and the wii. It sounds silly, but playing the wii for even 15 minutes a day can really get you moving!

I love getting messages from all of you, talking about your own experiences with weight loss or WW, so keep them coming! We can all learn from one another! That’s why I’m blogging about this now; it is not only keeping myself accountable, but it’s sharing tips with all of you, and hopefully motivating you to get healthy!

(week 11). nom nom.

This past week, my WW leader challenged us all to track our food. Of course, this is essential to helping the program work, but some get comfortable with the daily routine.

Even I skip tracking a snack or two... But this week, I was diligent with it, and it looks like it paid off: another pound (well, it was almost 1-1/2, but whatever) down!

It’s amazing to see what I end up consuming each day, especially when I compare my eating habits from a year ago. My biggest change, of course, was exchanging Dr. Pepper for his diet counterpart. That saves me up to 16 points each day! (Yes, I was ending up consuming up to 48-oz. each day) I’ve always been into fruit and vegetables, but now, I’m making a conscious effort to pile them on at (almost) every meal! Instead of running out for a hamburger or happy meal, I’m stopping for a salad, or filling up on power foods and packed lunches.

I think the key to my success has been snacking. Whether it’s popcorn, a piece of fruit or drinking a glass of water, I keep myself fueled with bits of food. I even keep point-conscious snacks at my desk, so I’m never without something to munch on.

I have been working on my self-control (one cookie, not two), and I’m succeeding more often than not. Some days get the best of me (last night’s shepard’s pie was calling my name!), but I’m working on it.

But no matter what, if it goes in my mouth, it gets tracked.

I had mentioned to someone my next over-arching goal is to lose 20 pounds in the next three months. Does that sound reasonable to you all? That’s an average of 1-1/2 pounds per week, which is something I think I can do... Thoughts?

WW is a tool I use to help me change my life. Without my drive and motivation to make it work, it wouldn’t. That’s the ultimate key here. If you don’t want it and WORK for it, it simply won’t happen. Work for it with me, people.

(week 10). do a little dance...

In my WW meetings before the holidays, I’d listen as my fellow WWers waxed on about how hard the Christmas season would be. Parties, food, alcohol... All the vices that got us here would come back to haunt in force.

Armed with tactics to get us through, we abandoned our meetings for TWO WEEKS! I promised myself that, while I would eat sensibly and maintain awareness, I would not track points or weigh myself until meetings resumed.

I think there were some moments of doing more than I should (steak and a margarita, and Christmas goodies to boot), but for the most part, I think I did well!

And the scale proved it... I lost 4.6 pounds over the few weeks away! For a girl who’s goal was to simply maintain, that is PHENOMENAL! That puts me at just about 14 pounds down in the 10 weeks, with my next goal—10%—a mere 8 pounds away!

But that’s not the only goal I’m shooting for. In three months, husband and I are going on a cruise. I’d like to see myself lose another 20 by then. Hopefully that’s a decent weight to feel comfortable in a bathing suit again. I haven’t been that size since I got engaged, I think. It’s crazy to think it’s actually attainable, as long as I stay on track!

Also, I’m happy to let you all know that the pedometer is really working out for me. The first two days, I walked an average of 9,000 steps, with me reaching about 11,000 steps yesterday! The number on the screen excites me, pushing me to (legitimately) get it higher. I hope to do 15,000 over the weekend. I can sense a long walk in Noah and mommy’s future...

I have been getting a lot of messages from friends, asking about my experience with WW. All in all, WW has been a super positive thing for me to get into. I’m learning about what I should and shouldn’t eat, all while not depriving myself (like actual diets do). I’m becoming more aware of activity, and pushing the little things I already do in my day to step it up. Most of all, I’m learning to love and appreciate who I am, all while working toward the best, most healthy me possible!

If you find yourself interested in not only losing weight, but becoming a more healthy person, consider joining. It may be hard to get used to tracking your food, but believe me, it’s so worth it. You’ll be amazed at how second nature it will start becoming. I’m not saying I’m there yet, but I’m on my way. Join me.

(week 9.5). particularly pedantic: pedometers

With the start of a new year, I’m trying to step up (pardon the pun, though I’m sure it won’t be the last) my daily activities. My ultimate goal is to reach 10,000 steps each day, and I believe I’m well on my way. Not only do I park fairly far out in the parking garage at work, I am on the third floor. I traipse through the compound from meeting to meeting, then find myself running after a toddler at home... When he runs out of steam, so do I.

Over the weekend, I purchased a pedometer. Nothing fancy—it’s enough to enter my step goal, and count steps and miles trekked—but it’s interesting to see the numbers. Yesterday afternoon, for spending a good amount of time playing with Noah (fairly sedentary), then chasing him around the house and more active playing, I walked 4700 steps. That was about 2.5 miles of walking according to my pedometer.

This morning, in the almost two hours I’ve had it on, I’ve gone 2800 steps, or 1.3 miles. Not too shabby, eh?

I really feel the basis for good health is being being active, so I’m starting with the basics. Make it a point to just get up and move more! Don’t try to carry to much; instead, walk smaller loads back and forth. (This is something I’m particularly living by, thanks to having to tote a baby along) Get out and stroll around! Use the time to breathe and de-stress. Every weekend, Noah and I walk around at least one store. Not only am I able to restock on the few things we need, but it gives us time to get out, change scenery and stretch our legs.

Have you used a pedometer before? What was your experience with it?

(week 7). the aftermath.

It’s been a few days since weigh-in, but I’m happy to announce that I’ve lost another 1.8 pounds! That brings my overall total in 42 days to 10.4 pounds (about 4 ounces a day)!

I’ve been sick for a few days, so it’s been hard to tune in to my body. I don’t know when I’m hungry, or full, or even able to eat at all! I feel like I’ve fallen off the wagon a bit since Thursday, but I’ve got two weeks until my next weigh-in (unless I go to a WW center), so I can focus on staying on track.

It helps that Noah is an active baby; he keeps me moving all day! In fact, he started WALKING last week! Oh my goodness, it seems like only yesterday that we brought him home, and now he’s practically running.

Over the holidays, I really plan to try to stick to what I should be eating. TRY is the key word. I don’t want to feel deprived or left out, but I also know that food won’t make me happy, so why over-do it?! I’ll focus on my son’s super-awesome first Christmas, and the family I will be surrounded by.

The positive train keeps on moving...

(week 6). I didn’t lose, I gained.

... and that’s a positive! Yes, I lost 2 pounds today. That’s 32 ounces of CRAP that just burned off of me. While I “lost” the weight, it’s such a gain for me. A gain of life, of self, of further motivation... I gained today by losing!

I control my own destiny in this. I pick the foods. I choose how active I am. It’s up to me how “in it” I become. I can’t blame anyone else but myself if I stop succeeding.

Here’s something I’m finding I need to work on: holiday time snacking! There is so much just lying around, waiting to be gobbled up. Today, bagels, brownies, donuts and more were part of the workplace spread. Of course, I couldn’t resist my favorite: wheat bagel and shmear. (8 PointsPLUS) ...that’s not so horrible when I pair it with a well-stocked salad for lunch, but it doesn’t help to munch on another half bagel (5 more PP!) and some Swedish Fish (4 PP for an OUNCE!). Ugh. I’m down 24 points for the day, and I still have dinner to go. Soup it shall be for me...

I can do this, I can do this, I can do this...

I got a few WW books today that can tell me the PP values of food... I counted it up, and the typical Olive Garden meal I’d have would be worth more than my daily point allowance! O. M. G. No wonder I gained the weight that I did. The chicken parm alone was 15, and that didn’t include the spaghetti side ... add in a few breadsticks and the salad (one serving of the salad is 8 PP, thanks to the dressing and the cheese), and you’re screwed.

I get that WW is not a program to deprive yourself of the things you love, but it’s definitely making me rethink the things I used to eat. And that’s not a bad thing, I’ve got to say. 50 years ago, we didn’t have the obesity problem America has now. Candy and junky snacks were treats, and fruits and veggies were staples (not the other way around, like it seems to be today). People didn’t gorge on ginormous portions—they ate until they were satisfied, and moved on. Food was social, but in a very different way. Kids were more active than they are now, too! We need to go back to that. We may not have our parents around to force us to “eat our vegetables” or “go play outside”, but we should listen to the smart, healthy voice in our head, prodding us in that direction.

Who’s with me?

Now, someone pass me the green beans...

week (almost 6). one pound down, hungry for more...

In all honesty, weigh in last week was a bit disappointing. It had been two weeks since I had weighed last, and I had only lost a pound. The positive in that, I know, is that I lost SOMETHING (especially over the holiday week), but I felt like I had done more than just a pound’s worth of work.

Sure, I had a few bad days. Without the baby there, I wasn’t moving as much, and quite honestly, I was mildly depressed. All that changed last week, though. I re-focused myself, and have been doing great ever since.

I had promised myself that I wouldn’t step on a scale unless it was for weigh in, but I couldn’t resist this morning. And as I stepped on the hallway scale WITH MY BOOTS AND EVERYTHING on, I found that I was down almost 7 pounds from last week!

A few things to note: it’s not calibrated the same as the WW scale, I’m sure. There’s got to be a few pound fluctuation. I was wearing shoes and a sweater, which are things I normally shed for weigh in. I have been moving and exercising this past week, as well as eating EXTREMELY well (even with four pieces of thin pizza last night—my weekly indulgence—I still had 3 points left over!)

Now, I just need to get through the holidays. I’m not taking much vacation time, so I’ll be busy with work. I’ve got a teething baby (he got FOUR teeth last Friday! At once!) and Christmas to sort out as well, but for now, I’m taking it in stride.

Fingers crossed Thursday’s weigh in goes well (and that I don’t get yelled at by my WW leader for losing TOO much in a week!).